An officer in a detention center gave me books that changed the way I think, and those books influenced my adjustment. They helped me develop confidence and helped to believe that I could recalibrate, or rebuild my life, even while I served decades in prison. Anyone can learn if they open their mind to learning from leaders. Consider the life of Epictetus and his handbook, also known as Enchiridion.
During my first year of confinement, while in solitary, Officer Wilson brought me a copy of Enchiridion by Epictetus. At the time, I was desperate for guidance, looking for ways to understand and cope with my situation. The book’s title, which translates to “Handbook,” intrigued me. It promised practical advice for navigating life’s challenges, and that was precisely what I needed. Epictetus, a former slave turned philosopher, presented a framework for living in a world that often feels out of our control. This message resonated deeply as I grappled with the isolation of prison and the uncertainty of my future.
Epictetus taught me a critical distinction: the difference between what is within my control and what is not. This concept really helped me at that specific time in my life, when I was facing life in prison and still locked in solitary. He wrote that:
“Some things are in our control and others not. Things in our control are opinion, pursuit, desire, aversion, and, in a word, whatever are our own actions. Things not in our control are body, property, reputation, command, and, in one word, whatever are not our own actions.”
This insight helped me shift my perspective. Instead of lamenting over the past or fearing the future—both beyond my influence—I began focusing on my thoughts, choices, and attitudes. I could not control the length of my sentence or the actions of others, but I could control how I responded to my circumstances.
Another lesson that resonated was the concept of living in harmony with nature, which Epictetus interprets as accepting life as it unfolds. He advises:
“Don’t demand that things happen as you wish, but wish that they happen as they do happen, and you will go on well.”
This principle challenged me to embrace the realities of confinement, not as an end, but as a terrain to navigate. By aligning my expectations with the reality of my situation, I could focus on what mattered: preparing myself for the future.
Epictetus also emphasized the importance of self-discipline and personal accountability. He writes:
“No man is free who is not master of himself.”
This lesson encouraged me to take ownership of my development, even within the constraints of prison. Instead of waiting for external changes, I began to work on internal transformation—reading, writing, and reflecting daily to rebuild my life.
Enchiridion offered a blueprint for enduring adversity with dignity and purpose. Its lessons became the foundation for my approach to confinement. I stopped seeing prison as a punishment and started viewing it as an opportunity to grow stronger mentally and spiritually.
The Stoic principles of controlling what I could, accepting what I could not, and living in accordance with reason guided me through the darkest moments of my sentence. They shaped my daily routines, helped me navigate challenges, and inspired me to set goals that would prepare me for success after release.
Epictetus’s teachings continue to influence my philosophy of life. By embracing his principles, I am better equipped to face any hardship with resilience and clarity. I strive to pass these lessons on to others, demonstrating that even in the most restrictive environments, one can find freedom by mastering the mind.
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Reflecting on the Stoic principle of controlling what is within your power and letting go of what is not, how can you apply this mindset to your current challenges? How would adopting this approach help you prepare for a better future?
